Panic-stricken is probably the way my life has shaped up. I am 47 and I have to wear diapers to hide my fecal incontinence. It feels shameful and embarrassing, and this has been with me for 20 long years. I have taken an appointment for colonoscopy and would also be going in for an anal sphincter repair surgery, or maybe a colostomy. I have decided to put a permanent end to this and cannot remain in isolation any longer. I had lied about my condition to my friends and family for fear of being shunned. I cannot go through a normal day without planning about how I would deal with this problem when I am in a grocery store, or at the gas station, or anywhere else. However, when I told my husband about this, it turned out that he and my children were actually my greatest support system. I no longer feel sorry for myself and I thank God for his love through my family. I have become much tolerant of my condition and I am sure that I will get cured one day!

It’s been six months since my bowel incontinence problem started, and I cannot bear the thought of having to deal with this for my entire life. I am 53 and feel frustrated at having to deal with this problem. I have confided in my family members and close friends about this and they have been very understanding, but my physicians don’t seem to respond well to my fecal incontinence problem. However, until I find a solution, I am thankful for having such a supporting family that I can share my problems with, and after reading through various blogs on websites, I have realized that my problem is shared by many others and that I am not alone in this battle!

I am a 38 year old woman and have virtually lived all my life with Hirschsprung’s disease. I had several surgeries as a baby, and this resulted in a terrible tear in my muscle that led to fecal incontinence. All my life I’ve had to wear diaper pads as I cannot control my bowel movement. I have lived a life of embarrassment, humiliation, and isolation. I was teased extremely in my childhood days which are very painful to remember and as an adult, I lacked the confidence to have an intimate relationship for fear of my incontinence. I also consulted a doctor as I desperately wanted to start a family, but then again I put off my thoughts for the fear of my children contracting my disease. I have been given a lot of hope by the doctor that getting physical therapy for strengthening my rectum muscles would be a good solution to my problem, but I had been too disillusioned to give that a try. However, now I have begun my therapy sessions and it is helping in a small way. The most important thing that I have learnt from this is to become strong and be thankful and compassionate. The best part is that I still haven’t given up.

I was petrified of laughing lest I leaked, scared of exercising in a group for the fear of embarrassment. It is very tough to deal with such a situation that can cause a lot of embarrassment. I went to a doctor and was told that my uncontrolled urination was related to stress incontinence and that it is relatively minor and can be fixed quite easily. It all started when I turned 44, when I suddenly felt a gush of urine flowing uncontrollably when I was in a meeting at work. It was embarrassing. Later I realized that even a slight pressure on my bladder would result in leaking, and then it happened when I laughed, sneezed, or coughed. I suddenly felt that I had lost control over my body. I kept this a close guarded secret between I, me, and myself. I tried hard to fix this problem and took to Kegel exercises to strengthen my pelvic muscles that actually lead to this problem. It initially worked fine for a few months, and then the leakage started again. I took to wearing panty liners regularly. Then, after a few suggestions I saw a surgeon and underwent a pelvic reconstructive surgery, which is a minimally invasive outpatient procedure that was minimally painful and fixed everything. I went back to work almost immediately and have not faced any leakage till date!

I guess I was born with a bladder problem and have memories of it from my childhood days. The embarrassment that I used to feel then was a difficult to tackle, especially with siblings and friends who wouldn’t understand my problem and would tease me for wetting my pants! I would end up leaking if I sneezed, laughed hard, or even exercised. I thought I would be fine as I grow older and so did my parents, but it went on. I turned 18 and that is when I actually went to the GP who diagnosed it as urinary incontinence. Now I knew that it was serious and that I would have to live with it. I went mad thinking about my future and how it wouldn’t be able to lead a normal life: I wouldn’t be able to marry and have children. The only question that went on in my head was, “Why me?” I was in a desperate situation and started isolating myself until I found a true friend who actually helped me and taught me how to deal with this as she had been doing as well. There is a special medical equipment called permanent catheters that are fitted in corsets and give a great control over the bladder. There are certain precautions you have to take regarding hygiene and all, but this has certainly sorted my life until I find a cure for this!